There is no right order to grief. You do not have to read this article today. But if you are here, you are probably realizing that the world does not pause — and neither do the platforms that held your loved one's digital life.
Facebook will not know someone has died unless you tell it. Instagram will not pause. Google's servers will keep running. And some of what your loved one left behind — their photos, their posts, their voice — is at risk of disappearing without warning.
This guide exists for one reason: to help you protect what matters, before a platform algorithm decides for you.
Why the First Week Matters More Than You Think
Most families don't realize how quickly a digital estate can become inaccessible. Within days of a death, several things can happen without anyone intending them:
A phone carrier may wipe a device after a missed payment.
A social platform may receive a report and lock or delete the account before family can act.
Voicemails are automatically deleted after 30 days on most carriers.
Cloud storage subscriptions lapse, taking photos with them.
Passwords stored on the device become inaccessible once the screen locks.
None of this is malicious. It is simply the system running as designed — for the living, not the grieving.
The good news: most of it is preventable. And the steps are simpler than you expect.
Before You Begin: Three Things to Do Right Now
If you are reading this within the first 48 hours of a death, do these three things before anything else.
1. Do not cancel the phone plan. Not yet. The phone may contain irreplaceable voicemails, text threads, and locally stored photos. Cancelling the plan too early can wipe the device. Keep the plan active for at least two to four weeks while you work through the checklist below.
2. Do not factory reset the phone. Even if you plan to pass it on. A reset erases everything stored locally, including content that was never backed up to the cloud.
3. Screenshot the lock screen. If you don't have the PIN, take note of the phone model and carrier now. You may need both when contacting the carrier later.
The Digital Checklist: Week One
Work through this at whatever pace feels right. If you can only do one item today, start with Step 1.
Step 1: Secure the phone — before anyone else does
The physical phone is the most urgent item. It is also the most overlooked.
If you have access to the phone and know the PIN, unlock it now and back up everything to iCloud or Google Photos before the screen auto-locks. If you don't have the PIN, contact the carrier directly. Most major carriers (Verizon, AT&T, T-Mobile) have a bereavement team that can help family members access or transfer a deceased person's account with a death certificate.
Do not attempt to guess the PIN more than five times. On most iPhones, ten failed attempts result in a permanent lock. On Android, the number varies by manufacturer.
What to save from the phone:
Voicemails (open the Phone app → Voicemail → play and screen-record each one)
Text message threads with family and close friends
Locally saved photos not yet backed up to cloud
Step 2: Download the Facebook archive immediately
This is the most time-sensitive digital step you will take.
Facebook allows families to request a full archive of a deceased person's account — but only before the account is memorialized or deleted. Once Facebook receives a memorialization request (which anyone can submit), family members lose the ability to log in or export the data.
How to download the Facebook archive (while you still have login access):
Log in to your loved one's Facebook account using their credentials.
Click the profile icon → Settings & Privacy → Settings.
Go to Your Facebook Information → Download Your Information.
Select all data types, choose the highest quality, and click Request a Download.
Facebook will email the account when the archive is ready — usually within 24 to 72 hours.
The downloaded archive will include posts, photos, videos, messages, and comments — everything they ever shared. This is the raw material for a memorial that can last for generations.
If you do not have login credentials, go to facebook.com/help/deceased and submit a Special Request for a Deceased Person's Account. You can request memorialization, which prevents further logins while preserving the profile. You will need proof of death and proof of your relationship.
Step 3: Save the Instagram content
Instagram is owned by Meta but operates separately from Facebook — meaning you need to take action on both platforms independently.
If you have the login credentials, download the Instagram data archive before doing anything else:
Go to Instagram.com → Settings → Privacy and Security → Download Data.
Enter an email address and request the download.
Instagram will send the archive link within 14 days.
The archive includes photos, videos, stories, messages, and profile information.
If you do not have login access, submit a memorialization request at instagram.com/memorialization/request. Once memorialized, the account is preserved but no new content can be added or downloaded.
Step 4: Check the Google account
Google offers a feature called Inactive Account Manager that allows users to designate what happens to their account after a period of inactivity. Most people have never set it up.
If your loved one's Google account becomes inactive (meaning no logins for a period of time), Google may eventually delete it along with Gmail, Google Photos, Google Drive, and YouTube content.
What to do:
Try to log in to the Google account with their credentials.
If you have access, go to Google Takeout (takeout.google.com) and download the full account archive. This includes Gmail, Google Photos, Google Drive, YouTube, and more.
If you do not have access, submit a request at google.com/deceased. Google will review the case with a death certificate and may grant access to specific content on a case-by-case basis.
Google Photos in particular may contain years of automatically backed-up photos that exist nowhere else. Do not overlook this step.
Step 5: Check Apple iCloud
Apple's approach to account access after death is the most restrictive of all major platforms. Unless your loved one had set up Digital Legacy — Apple's feature for designating a legacy contact — getting access to iCloud content requires a court order.
Check for Digital Legacy first:
On an Apple device linked to the account, go to: Settings → [Name] → Password & Security → Legacy Contact
If a legacy contact was set up and you are the designated contact, you will have an access key that grants you entry to photos, messages, notes, and more.
If Digital Legacy was not set up, you will need to contact Apple Support and provide a death certificate. Apple will assess on a case-by-case basis. In some cases, a court order from your local jurisdiction is required before Apple will release any content.
Save voicemails from the iPhone if possible:
Voicemails are stored locally on the phone, not in iCloud. If you have access to the unlocked phone, play each voicemail and use a second phone to record the audio. There is no official way to export voicemails from an iPhone without third-party tools.
Step 6: Create a central place for the family to gather
Once you have secured the archives, the next urgent need is coordination. In the days after a death, photos and memories arrive from every direction — relatives texting old pictures, friends posting on Facebook, colleagues sharing stories over email.
Without a central place, this content scatters and disappears.
This is where a digital memorial page becomes not just a tribute, but a practical tool. With E-Memory, you can create a free memorial page in minutes, import a Facebook or Instagram archive directly, and share a single link — or a QR code — with every family member and friend, wherever they are in the world.
The page can grow over time. Aunts and cousins can add their own photos. Children can come back years later and meet the person their parent was before they were born.
Create a free memorial page on E-Memory →
Step 7: Notify the platforms you are not actively saving
Once you have downloaded the archives you need, decide what to do with each remaining account. You have three options for most platforms: memorialize, delete, or leave active.
Memorialization preserves the account in a read-only state. The profile remains visible to friends and family, but no one can log in, and the platform treats it as a tribute rather than an active account. This is the right choice for most social media accounts.
Deletion removes the account permanently. Choose this for accounts that contained sensitive information (online banking, shopping accounts, email) once you have retrieved anything useful.
Leaving active is the default if you do nothing — and it often leads to uncomfortable situations: birthday reminders from the platform, friend suggestions that include the deceased, or spam accounts targeting inactive profiles.
Checklist of platforms to address:
Facebook → memorialize or delete
Instagram → memorialize or delete
Twitter / X → submit a deactivation request with a death certificate
LinkedIn → submit a removal request at linkedin.com/help/linkedin/ask/ts-rdmlp
Google / Gmail → request deletion or use Inactive Account Manager if credentials are unavailable
Apple ID / iCloud → request access or deletion via Apple Support
Spotify / streaming accounts → cancel subscriptions to stop billing
Amazon → contact customer service to close the account and handle outstanding orders
PayPal / Venmo → report the death and request account closure; any balance can be transferred to the estate
Step 8: Preserve things that are not on social media
The most irreplaceable content is often the content that was never posted anywhere.
Go through these before the phone plan lapses or the device changes hands:
Text message threads — screenshot or back up entire conversations with close family members. These contain daily life in a way no Facebook post ever captured.
Voice memos and audio notes — search the Voice Memos app on iPhone or the Recorder app on Android.
Notes apps — personal notes, lists, ideas, and drafts written for no audience but themselves.
Camera roll videos — short clips taken spontaneously are often the most precious. Make sure the entire camera roll is backed up before anything else happens to the phone.
Old emails — search the inbox for family threads, travel bookings, and correspondence with people you should notify.
Step 9: Tell the people who need to know
Part of the digital estate is relational — the communities your loved one was part of that you may not know about.
Check their email inbox for newsletters, community groups, or organizations they were active in. A brief, kind message to those communities — "I'm writing to let you know that [name] passed away on [date]" — closes the loop in a dignified way and prevents the painful experience of automated birthday emails or group messages addressed to someone who is no longer here.
Step 10: Decide what to do with the archive
By the end of the first week, if you have followed this checklist, you will have a collection of digital archives that may feel overwhelming. Thousands of photos. Years of posts. Messages and conversations.
You do not need to process all of it now. But you do need somewhere to keep it that is not a folder on your desktop or a USB drive that might get lost.
E-Memory was built specifically for this moment. Upload the Facebook or Instagram archive directly, and the platform automatically organizes it into a chronological life story - a beautiful, permanent page that your family can return to whenever they need to feel close to the person they lost.
FAQ
How do I access a deceased person's accounts if I don't have their password?
Each platform has a different process. Facebook, Instagram, and Google all have online forms for family members to submit with a death certificate. Apple is the most restrictive — if Digital Legacy was not set up, you may need a court order. Start with the platform's official help center and search for "deceased account" or "memorial request."
Can I download a deceased person's Facebook photos without their password?
If you have login access, you can download the full archive through Settings → Your Facebook Information → Download Your Information. If you do not have login access, Facebook's Special Request form allows family members to request specific content, but this process can take weeks and is not guaranteed to include all photos.
How long does Facebook keep a deceased person's account before deleting it?
Facebook does not automatically delete accounts after death. Accounts remain active indefinitely unless someone submits a memorialization or deletion request. However, if no action is taken, the account may be targeted by spam or hacking attempts over time.
What happens to a Google account when someone dies?
If no one takes action, a Google account becomes inactive after an extended period without logins. Google's Inactive Account Manager can be set up in advance to specify what happens — but most people never do this. If the account goes inactive and no one has submitted a request, Google may eventually delete it along with all associated content.
How do I save voicemails from a deceased person's iPhone?
Voicemails are stored locally on the iPhone, not in iCloud. If you have access to the unlocked phone, the simplest method is to play the voicemail on speaker while recording with a second phone. Third-party tools like DecipherTools for Mac and Windows can also export voicemails as audio files.
Is it possible to recover a deleted social media account?
In most cases, no. Once a platform deletes an account - whether through inactivity, a deletion request, or an accidental process - the content is permanently lost. This is why acting in the first week matters so much.
What is the best way to preserve a loved one's digital memories long-term?
The most reliable approach is to download full archives from every platform, then store them in a dedicated memorial platform rather than a local hard drive. E-Memory allows you to import Facebook and Instagram archives directly and turn them into a permanent, shareable memorial page - one that the whole family can contribute to and return to for years.
One Last Thing
There is no checklist that makes this easier. Grief does not follow steps. Some of these tasks may feel unbearable today and manageable next week. Others may feel urgent right now.
Do what you can. Ask for help with the rest. The digital world will wait — but not forever.
If you would like a single place to bring everything together, E-Memory is free to start. You can create a memorial page for your loved one in minutes, import their social media archive, and share it with family near and far.
Start preserving their story — free, no credit card required →
Published by E-Memory | e-memory.app Updated: June 2026
